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Stedet hvor alt startet


Category: Verden, fra mitt perspektiv // 04.10.2017 at.20:53 o' clock // 4 comments


Selv om jeg omtaler Arendal som hjembyen min, ble jeg ikke født der. De tre første årene av mitt liv tilbrakte jeg i nabobyen Grimstad, i en leilighet midt i sentrum, i grei gåavstand til byens lokale handlesenter Oddensenteret.



I likhet med nabobyen, er også Grimstad en havneby, hvor båter og sjømat ofte står i fokus.



På vei fra havnen og oppover mot gågaten finner vi to sykler i et glassmonter. En liten hyllest til tour de france-mesterne Dag Otto Lauritzen og Thor Hushovd, som begge kommer fra Grimstad by. 



I gågata finner vi spennende butikker og kunst på hvert eneste hjørne.



Slik som denne artige trappen rett ved La Familia.



Grimstad har også en butikk oppkalt etter den svenske bloggeren Kenza. Foran Kenza ligger butikken 'Mye Fint' som fører flere spennende merker, og dessuten har en rosa(!) vaskemaskin med kjøleskapsdør utstilt i vinduet.


4 comments



La meg ta deg med til (hjem)byen min


Category: Verden, fra mitt perspektiv // 03.10.2017 at.17:51 o' clock // 10 comments


Vi har ikke særlig mange måker i Gol. Derfor synes jeg det var stas å se dem igjen i Arendal. Folk som gikk forbi må ha trodd jeg var klin sprø der jeg gikk rundt og tok bilder av måkene, men .. De er vakre. Majestetiske skapninger. Jeg tror måker er en slik ting man er nødt til å gå en lang periode uten for virkelig å kunne se hvor flotte de er når man kommer tilbake.



Det er høst nå. Det betyr at det ikke lenger er proppfullt av folk ved havnen. Ingen som står i båtene sine og selger fersk sjømat. Ikke mer båtrace. Men det er fint. Jo færre folk, jo bedre bilder.



"Bli stående", sier jeg til mamma idet hun gjør tegn til å gå bort så jeg kan ta bilde. Jeg vil ha henne med på bildet. Det blir fint slik, med mamma som ser på klær, og med trefoldighetskirken i bakgrunnen. Selv om mamma har blitt mer open minded til sosiale medier etter at hun fikk seg facebook, tar jeg likevel ikke sjansen på å poste et gjenkjennelig bilde av henne her. Hun ville nok ikke like det - ergo får jeg sladde ansiktet.



Jeg liker trefoldighetskirken, selv om jeg mener religion er en u-ting. Det store tårnet er på en måte Arendals perle. Byens signatur. Dèt, og havna. "Pollen", kaller vi den. Havna, altså.


10 comments



Politikk: dette skremmer meg


Category: Verden, fra mitt perspektiv // 13.09.2017 at.21:33 o' clock // 9 comments


Tiende september, to tusen og tretten. Det føles som det var i går. Jeg kan fremdeles huske hvordan jeg, som egentlig aldri har fulgt særlig med i politikken, ble så rasende forbannet over valgresultatet at daværende samboer ikke en gang fikk lov å snakke til meg. Hvordan jeg gremmet meg på vegne av selvgode Siv Jensen der hun valset overstadig beruset opp på podiet og kauket "MORNA JENS!" midt i beste - eller skal jeg si verste? - sendetid.

Fire år senere sitter vi her igjen. Stortingsvalget 2017. Jeg er ikke en slik person som gjør meg opp noen mening om hvem jeg skal stemme på, men i år gjorde jeg faktisk det. I år ville min stemme gått til Miljøpartiet. Jeg syntes de hadde mye bra, enda jeg godt vet at de aller fleste vil være sterkt uenig. Slik er det nemlig; det som er best for helse og miljø, er også det som gjør folk hoppende, rasende forbannet. Alle vil ha en bedre verden, men de aller færreste er villig til å gjøre en egeninnsats, eller faktisk ofre noe som helst, for å få det til. Kall det gjerne egoisme - det gjør nemlig jeg.

Valget har kommet og gått, og resultatet er klart som blekk; det blir fire nye år med Høyre. Jeg, personlig, kan ikke engang høre ordet 'høyre' uten å tenke Anders Behring Breivik, eller ABB som vi ofte kaller ham. He who shall not be named. Prakteksempelet på høyreekstremisme.

[ HØYREKSTREMISME: ideologien om at visse menneskegrupper er mer verd enn andre enn andre basert på kultur, rase, eller religion. Noen høyreekstreme kan bruke vold eller terror for å oppnå sine mål. ]
- Wikipedia (forenklet forklaring).


I løpet av de fire årene som har gått fra valgkampen 2013 til valgkampen 2017 har mye skjedd. Fremmedfrykten har fått tid til å gro og slå ordentlige røtter i det norske folk. Hatet - eller skal jeg si frykten? - for muslimer og andre med annen hudfarge har økt betraktelig, og det er nå helt ok å si på sosiale medier at ABB var 'inne på noe'. Nazistene marsjerer åpenlyst i Kristiansands gater, midt på lyse dagen. Frisører i godt voksen alder ber strengt kvinner med hijab forlate salongen fordi de ikke vil, for å bruke frisør Merete Hodnes ord, "ta i sånne". Den aller største forskjellen ser jeg likevel hos folket; Da mørkhudede Jessica Kiil i 2011 ble slått ned på Karl Johan på grunn av hudfargen, reagerte folket med sinne rettet mot rasisten som hadde angrepet henne. I 2015, når hijabkledde Malika Bayan kommer inn på frisør Merete Hodnes salong for å få farget håret men blir vist på dør fordi Hodne ikke vil ta i muslimer, er det Malika selv de aller fleste retter sitt sinne mot, under påskudd om at aksjonen var planlagt fra Malikas side, i et forsøk på å snikislamere landet.

Det er tydelig at folk er mer redde nå enn de var tidligere. Mer skeptiske ovenfor mennesker med andre religioner og hudfarger enn det som er 'typisk norsk'. Mye av dette tror jeg skyldes Fremskrittspartiet, som i 2013 spilte direkte på fremmedfrykt for å sanke stemmer. Partiet lovet den gang å 'gjøre Norge trygt' ved å få full stopp på all innvandring, sende ut flere, og å gjøre det vanskeligere å få asyl.

Noe lignende brukte også Donald Trump som sitt valgløfte da han stilte som presidentkandidat i 2016; "Make America great again", ved å sende ut innvandrere, gjøre det tilnærmet umulig å få oppholdstillatelse (da spesielt om du er muslim) og å bygge en mur for å holde meksikanere ute.


Ved å appellere direkte til de aller mest skeptiske og redde av oss, og fyre opp under troen på at de virkelig har noe å frykte fra fremmede kulturer, klarte både Fremskrittspartiet og Donald Trump å komme seg til toppen med løfter om å fjerne det som var 'skummelt' og 'farlig'. I 2017 har FRP igjen spilt på fremmedfrykt for å komme seg opp og frem, blant annet ved å love at det blir forbud mot hijab i skolen.

ABB er tilhenger av FRP, og ønsker en høyrestyrt regjering. For andre år på rad oppfyller vi hans ønske. Og vet dere hva? Det skremmer meg.


9 comments



Dear stranger on social media


Category: Verden, fra mitt perspektiv // 28.08.2017 at.21:34 o' clock // No comments


We all come into this world as small, fragile creatures. Defenseless, and probably scared to death by all the new faces, sounds, and smells. Some of us scream at birth. Others lie completely still. This is the first sign that even though we are similar in looks, our minds work differently.



As we grow older, our parents will start to detect a personality; some of us sleep a lot, others do not. Some of us want to be breastfed, others will scream their lungs out until you give them a bottle. Some are eager to meet new people, others are shy.

Eventually we learn to walk and talk. We can finally use words to tell people what we prefer. Some want dolls, others want cars. Some want pretty little pink dresses, others want a t-shirt and a pair of pants. Some enjoy watching movies and playing video games, others want to climb trees and bake cakes out of mud.

Then we start school. We are taught that there is a right, and a wrong, way to do things. A classmate of mine was taught she held the pencil wrong. She drew the most amazing pictures, but no; she held the pencil wrong. I, personally, used 'the wrong hand'. Another kid read 'too slow'. We are taught that even though it works for us, it's not right, and it has to change. We are taught to let go of our uniqueness and adapt to a 'one way fits all' kind of style.

We are taught that differences are something we should discourage. That girls love pink and boys love blue. That two girls, or two guys, cannot have romantic feelings for each other. That boys can't wear dresses and girls can't have short hair, unless they're sick. We are taught these things, and we are taught that if anyone is different - if anyone is 'wrong' - they need to be destroyed. They need to learn their place. That what they are doing is wrong, and it has consequences.

So we bully. We mock people. We laugh at them. We treat them like garbage. Because that's what we've been taught to do, and that's why so many don't realize that it's a bad thing. Even worse; that's why so many people willingly hurt other people, and feel no regret for their actions, even though they know they are causing them pain.

With social media it becomes even easier to bully, because your victim aren't physically there with you, and can't take revenge. If you were standing in front of them and pissing them off, they could slap you across the face or kick you in the nuts, but on social media they can't do that. All they can do is run their fingers across the keyboard. On social media you can make fun of a person without even having to look them in the eyes.

Sadly, I've noticed people taking advantage of that. Especially grown men and women in their late 30's and mid 40's. Some even older. Whenever I comment something on facebook and someone disagrees with me, I usually have people mocking the way I look or they are telling others not to take me seriously because I write a blog. I once had a guy telling me: "before you talk about superficiality, take a look in the mirror". That one comment in particular annoyed me.

It didn't hurt me. It didn't make me feel bad about myself or question my abilities. It simply annoyed me, for the exact reason that superficiality has nothing to do with how a person looks. Even though we are taught that you can always see on a person how they are as people, that's wrong.

That fat chick in the resturant? Who knows, maybe she used to be bigger? Maybe she's starving herself? Don't assume she's just "stuffing her face" and don't care about what she looks like.

That skinny chick on the bus? Maybe she's eating like crazy but are unable to gain weight. Don't just assume she's an anorexic.

That chick with a lot of makeup, expensive clothes and perfect hair? Maybe she's the nicest person you'll ever meet. Don't assume that just because she's pretty, she must be either dumb or full of herself.

The chick who doesn't wear makeup and wears hand me down clothes that hardly fit? Who knows, she could be really into fashion and makeup, she's just too poor to afford it, and she'd rather wear no makeup than cheap makeup because she actually takes care of her skin?

That stripper in the club? Maybe she's a stripper so she can afford to take a higher education.

That straight A student? Maybe she's the biggest party girl around town. Goes crazy two days a week, takes school seriously five days a week?

That fourteen year old mother? Maybe she was raped.

 
I don't judge people based on what they look like. I judge them based on whether or not they're treating me like shit. So dear stranger seeing my pictures and telling me that I don't have a right to talk about superficiality because I look a certain way, let me ask you a question:

What's more superficial; having a face full of makeup, or going around judging people based on their profile picture on facebook?
 


0 comments



Women aren't the only victims


Category: Verden, fra mitt perspektiv // 19.08.2017 at.12:56 o' clock // 7 comments


Being a girl is hard. You're constantly told, even from a young age, what you should be like. That you shouldn't eat too much sugar because you'll get fat, and boys don't like fat girls. That you should watch your mouth, because boys don't like a girl with a bad language. As you grow older, you're taught that short hair is for boys only, and that they like girls with long, soft hair.

When you become a teenager you're taught to shave your private parts because hair is for grown men, and that your breasts should be bigger, because that's what guys like. You're taught to hide your imperfections with makeup, so you'll look perfect and guys will find you pretty. You are also taught that guys don't like too much makeup, so you better watch it. You're supposed to look natural, with the help of unnatural products. You're compared to celebrities like Megan Fox and Pamela Anderson, and expected to look like that naturally, because a girl who's had cosmetic surgery is a fake. You're expected to have the bedroom skills of a porn star, but at the same time, you shouldn't have too much experience because that means you're a slut.

Being a girl is hard, and not a day goes by without some girl complaining about it on social media.




It seems to me that, with the spotlight being on us girls and our constant whining about how the sizes in the clothing store doesn't fit us any more, the beach body, the price tag on tampons, for so long, we've forgotten that women aren't the only victims.

It seems that we've forgotten...

that guys are mocked for talking about their feelings or showing emotions because it's "girly" and "weak".

that being a male virgin makes people think of him as a loser.

that if a guy's not confident in his own skin he's expected to suck it up and not talk about it.

that a guy can't be into fashion, hair or skin care without people thinking he's into other men as well.

that the word 'gay' is used as an insult, as a way of telling a guy he's less of a man.

that a man dressed as a woman is considered a freak and often bullied for it.

that abusive relationships where the male is the victim aren't taken seriously.

that men being raped by women aren't taken seriously.

that men aren't supposed to wear pink because it's considered a girly color.

that men working in kindergartens are often thought to be pedophiles.

that while girls are expected to have a hot bikini body, men are expected to have a sixpack.

that if a man impregnates a woman, she can have an abortion without his consent.

that if the condom breaks, she can make him a father without his consent and by law force him to DNA test against his will and pay up for the next 18 years of his life.

that if a couple split up, their children usually stays with the mother.

that being a lesbian is more socially acceptable than being a gay male.

that while girls worry about the size of their breasts, guys worry about the size of their dick.

that while we have breast cancer awareness month every october, there's no such thing as testicular cancer awareness month.

that it's more socially acceptable for little girls to dream of their wedding day than it is for little boys.

that men are often mocked by their friends for being "whipped" when respecting their girlfriend.


So how bout we stop pretending that females are the only victims of society and start dealing with the fact that we're all "victims" here, and the only difference is that while one gender was brought up to talk about their feelings, the other was brought up to brush it off and 'take it like a man'?


7 comments



10 tips to save more money


Category: Verden, fra mitt perspektiv // 16.08.2017 at.22:25 o' clock // No comments


Money, money, money - that's all people seem to talk about most of their lives. They either have too much and enjoy bragging about it, or they have too little and suffer because of it. Most of us are somewhere in between: we get to eat 3 times a day and pay our bills, but we find ourselves wishing we could afford a fancier car or a bigger house. Here's my ten tips on how to save more money.

01 You can get food at 50% off if it expires the next day. Stock up and freeze it.
02 Make, and bring, your own lunch to work / school.
03 Walking / biking saves you a lot of gas money.
04 Never buy a piece of clothing just because it's on sale.

05 Buy directly from China. Most of the items (not including food) you buy here have a 'made in china' label on them. Clothes, toys, sunglasses, bags.. Things like that. That's because the products are sold from China to resellers in Norway, USA, England, basically everywhere. It's common practice, at least here in Norway, to add an extra zero to the price. A toy that would cost you 2 NOK ($0.26) in China would cost 20 NOK ($2.53) in Norway. A piece of clothing that would cost 20 NOK in China ($2.53), are sold by H&M for 200 NOK ($26), and so on. By buying directly from China, for example through eBay, you'll save a lot of money.
 
06 Get a free membership wherever possible. Supermarkeds and gas station usually offer a membership discount.

07
You can get a designer bag for (almost) a reasonable price by buying second hand.

08 Work out at home instead of getting a gym membership.

09 As long as there's daylight, you don't need to use lamps. Unless you live in a house where there are no, or very few, windows.

10 Learn how to cook.


0 comments



Look for anything but your perfect match


Category: Verden, fra mitt perspektiv // 14.08.2017 at.18:41 o' clock // 2 comments


 

When looking for a new friend or lover, don't go looking for your perfect match.

Instead, look for someone who's different.

If you always surround yourself with people who are just like yourself, that's all you'll ever know.

People who are always surrounding themselves with things they're already familiar with, things that are safe, that they know they'll like, will never grow. They'll be like trees; stuck in one place.

Life's so much more than just your version of it.

Find yourself a person who's different, and let them influence you with their personality. Let them take you places you've never even considered going, and let them choose that one movie on netflix that you've scrolled past a billion times because it looks boring. Let them take you to concerts and listen to bands you've never heard of and genres of music you've never even liked. Give them some money and let them buy you something they'd want you to wear.

Because, who knows? You might be surprised.

Surprised by how good that movie turned out to be, or how the lyrics in that one song seems to describe you perfectly. Surprised by how nice that place was, or how sexy you felt in the outfit they picked out for you, even if you'd never consider buying any of those pieces when shopping by yourself.

You might end up finding new favorites

in things you'd never even consider giving a chance

if it weren't for that person who came into your life,

opened your eyes,

and gave you a whole new perspective on things.


2 comments



How to make life great again


Category: Verden, fra mitt perspektiv // 13.08.2017 at.13:16 o' clock // One comment


I love the 21st century. Yet, at the same time, I find it very depressing. Sure it's fun to watch a movie or spend some time on social media once in a while, but I just can't shake the feeling that I'm wasting my time. That I should be enjoying my youth intead of spending it sitting in my own living room staring into a screen of some sorts. After all, isn't that the kind of things we should be doing when we are old and our legs no longer work without the help of a walker?

01 Get a pen pal. Preferably a family member that lives far away. Instead of calling them on skype or texting them on facebook, write them an actual letter and send it in the mail. Ask them to write you back. Try to write each other once a week / month. Not only is it a great way of connecting with your family members on a deeper level, but even to this day, recieving a hand written letter from someone you care about, just feels more personal than a quick text or a call.

02 Dates these days tend to be shallow. Most people just text each other their adress and meet up for some netflix and chill. Next time, make it a picnic. Put on your sundress, pack some goodies (bread, butter, all that usual stuff, maybe even some cupcakes) and go to the park, or somewhere else, and have an actual date. Most people think of this as a summer activity only, but  if you change your clothing, you can do picnic dates all year round.

03 Speaking of picnic dates; it doesn't have to be during the day. Get out in the middle of the night and head for the hills. Do some star gazing, and wait for the sun to rise. Bring your camera.

04 Go camping. In tents.

05 Go somewhere new. I know that if you're unemployed you probably can't afford to just pack your bags and buy a ticket to Spain. But that doesn't mean you have to stay home. Book a hotel room in another state or town, and see what it has to offer. Probably a lot more than you originally thought. 

06 Don't have any friends? On facebook you do! So why not throw yourself a party and invite them?

07 Dare to be yourself. From my "whisper" days (it's an app where people share secrets anonymously), I remember a lot of people saying they love halloween because it's the one day a year when they can truly be themselves without people judging them. That's sad. That's really, really sad. Especially because the people they fear judgment from are, in fact, just people. People who are no better, and no worse, than you. People who, just like you, fear judgment from other people. Don't force yourself to put up a mask and pretend to be something you feel like isn't really you, just to please other people. Pardon my french, but fuck that shit. Be yourself. Even if that means walking around with fangs and red contacts in July. Don't ever let the fear of being different keep you from expressing your inner self. Because until you're living life as yourself, you're not living at all. What a waste it would be, to die, without having ever truly lived. 


1 comment



When parents are the worst bullies


Category: Verden, fra mitt perspektiv // 07.08.2017 at.21:56 o' clock // 2 comments


I have very strong opinions, some of which might be considered abnormal or crazy by the general public, and I'm not afraid to share them, be it on social media or in person. I won't keep quiet if provoked, and I don't mind spending hours arguing why I'm right. This has earned me a lot of nasty comments on social media. Some might think that I'm asking for it, because hate is the price you pay for speaking your mind, and I can't say I disagree. I know the consequences of being honest, and I can take whatever bullcrap people throw at me, which is usually men 50+ calling me a "sallad" (how original..) because my name's Jessica Waldorf on facebook, or someone saying that because I look a certain way, I should not be taken seriously.



With that being said, I'll gladly admit that I am concerned. I am concerned with the fact that the majority of mean people on the internet are parents. It worries me that these people, who spend their lives sitting on facebook making fun of my looks and telling me people like me should not be taken seriously, are responsible for teaching young children the difference between right and wrong.

How can you raise a child to be a decent person if you aren't a decent person yourself?


People always talk about how bullying is such a big issue. How children as young as six years old call each other names and laugh at each others flaws. How eight year olds are killing themselves because they're being bullied in school, and what could be done to prevent this from being an issue in the future.

If you are a person in your late 20's, mid 30's, early 40's or anywhere in between, with a kid or plans of having children in the future, you need to grow up a little and stop telling people to kill themselves just because you disagree with something they said. You need to stop using words such as retard, moron, dumb fuck, idiot and other names as an argument or trying to win the discussion by making fun of their looks, their name or their interests. The minute you turn to name calling you're no longer arguing; you're bullying.

The thing that most people don't realize is that children learn from their parents, not by words, but by actions. A good example are children who are born in a home where either the mother, the father or both parents are smokers. In most cases the child itself will grow up to be a smoker, regardless of how many times their parents tell them that smoking is bad. This is because children pay more attention to how you behave than what you say.

With that in mind, dear parents, future parents, or just anyone who's reading this, next time you find yourself having a disagreement with someone:


RAISE YOUR
ARGUMENTS,
NOT YOUR INSULTS!


2 comments



Stop romanticizing abuse!


Category: Verden, fra mitt perspektiv // 04.08.2017 at.07:43 o' clock // No comments


When she was six years old, a boy pulled her hair.
"it's because he likes you", her parents said.

When she was ten, a boy grabbed her arm and wrestled her to the ground.
"That's just how boys are", teachers explained.

When she was seventeen, a boy smacked her ass in public.
"ooh, he thinks you're hot!", her friends told her.

When she was twenty two, she came to work with a black eye. 
"It's because I love you", her boyfriend claimed.
And she believed him.

After all, how could she not, when all her life, people around her had romanticized abuse?


0 comments



Here's why you CAN compare animals to people


Category: Verden, fra mitt perspektiv // 03.08.2017 at.15:17 o' clock // No comments


I've always loved animals. As a child I had countless conversations with people trying to force their speciesism down my throat. People would tell me that you can't compare animals to people, and I would demand they gave me a valid reason. People would lecture me about 'human qualities', and I would tell them that you'd have to be an idiot to believe that those qualities can only be found in human beings. Today I know better than to call people names, but I'm still convinced there's no such thing as 'human qualities'. Why? First off, it doesn't really seem logical. And second, and most importantly; science has proven me right. Here's a few fun, scientific facts about animals that you probably didn't know.



Cows have best friends and get stressed when they are separated.

When male puppies play with female puppies they intentionally let the female puppies win

Rats giggle when you tickle them, but their voices are so high pitched you can't hear them without equipment

When a male penguin finds a female he likes, he proposes to her with a pebble. If she accepts, they stay together for the rest of their lives.

Otters sleep holding hands so they don't float away from each other.

Wolves use facial expressions as a way of communicating

According to scientists, dolphins are more emotionally evolved than humans.

Ravens can remember faces. If you are mean to one, it will warn other ravens about you and try to take revenge.

Dogs laugh often but humans have trouble recognizing it because it sounds just like panting.

Dogs percieve humans differently from themselves, but cats do not. Cats treat humans like they would treat another cat

Where there are wolves, there are ravens. Ravens follow wolves around, simply because they like them. They also prefer to eat with the wolves instead of alone.

Elephants, just like humans, birds in the raven family and monkeys, console one another with gentle touches and trunk strokes when they are upset.

Octopuses (yes, that's the correct term) are so smart that they are given puzzles so they don't get bored in captivity.

  Tigers are one of the the most vengeful animals on the planet and they always take revenge on those who have wronged them.

Elephants and swans can die of a broken heart if their partner dies. They lay down and shed tears until they starve to death.

Dolphins, whales and apes are known to commit suicide when depressed.

Cats hiss because they're imitating the threat of a snake. Most species recognize and fear a snake's hiss and cats imitate this to avoid confrontation. So next time your cat hisses at you, remember that it's not only telling you to back off, it's also pretending to be an animal that can kill you.

If ants encounter a drunk comrade, they will carry him home to sleep it off.

Female dragonflies often fake their own death to avoid having sex.




Because those so called 'human qualities' can be found in the animal kindom as well, the name HUMAN qualities should no longer be used. A better name would be 'earthling qualities', or simply just.. Qualities. 


0 comments



Dear straight girls (and gay guys)


Category: Verden, fra mitt perspektiv // 28.07.2017 at.22:19 o' clock // 3 comments


YO IN DA HOOD!, as we used to say back in the days. The more I think about it, the funnier it gets. I'm sure every 90's kid can relate. You had to get off the internet cause your dad had important calls to make. You had to download music through limewire (which took forever) and when you played the song you just downloaded, thinking it would be Beyonce, it turned out to be some indian dude singing. If you downloaded music videos they usually turned out to be amateur porn. Those were the days, eh?

I'm sure teenagers today don't have a clue what I'm talking about, which means; I'm old. Practically a dinosaur. But you know what they say; old people are the wisest. So let me share some of my wisdom (lol) with you. Some I learned the hard way, others are just plain logic. 




Just because he's your boyfriend, doesn't mean you owe him sex.

If a boy says he likes you but he's not ready for a relationship; let him go. Men are natural born hunters; if they want something, they'll chase it. If he's not chasing you, he doesn't really want you.

If a guy says he wants you, but runs to someone else the minute you turn him down, he never really wanted you in the first place. He wanted whoever he could get, not someone in particular.

If you're 13-14 years old and an older guy 18+ gives you attention and wants to be with you, chances are, he's manipulating you. Usually a guy 18+ would go for someone his own age, that he can show off to his buddies, party with, move in with and have an actual future with. When a guy that old goes for someone that young it's usually because teens that young are easier to manipulate due to the fact that they are insecure and have a burning desire to prove that they're not little kids anymore. You'll probably end up accepting a lot more from him, and do at lot more for him, than any partner his age would. Because he can win any fight, and manipulate you to do anything he wants - usually sexual stuff - by saying things like "I didn't know I was dating a baby" and "I thought you were more mature".

If he won't have your relationship on facebook, he's probably hiding something. Like a wife. Don't fall for the "psycho ex" excuse.

Never trust a guy who's always on his phone but takes hours to text you back.

If he's cheating on his partner with you, he'll most likely cheat on you with someone else.

If he constantly mocks you, tells you how much you need him, and makes rules about how you are 'allowed' to dress, who you are 'allowed' to talk to, if he hits you or kicks you, apologizes, promise he won't do it again, and he still does, just walk away. He's never gonna change, and it'll only get worse. Every time you forgive him, every time you stay, he loses a little more respect for you. And some day he won't bother apologizing for the pain he's causing you, or promise it won't happen again. He'll just do it, over and over, and you'll be too weak to care. If he really loved you, he wouldn't treat you like this.

If he cheats on you once, end it. He'll probably do it again.


3 comments



5 tips to fall asleep


Category: Verden, fra mitt perspektiv // 24.07.2017 at.18:57 o' clock // 2 comments


I've suffered from insomnia since I was very young. Probably 6-7 years old, give or take. So if you ever just lie there with your eyes closed, trying to count imaginary sheeps, counting backwards from ten, checking your alarm clock (or phone. We use phones nowadays) every 30 minutes, thinking: "it's 3:30! I REALLY need to get some sleep!" and so on, I know what it's like. So in this blog post I'm gonna share a few tips that works for me, and hopefully also for you.



01 A HOT SHOWER BEFORE BEDTIME
A hot shower will make you feel more relaxed and comfortable. Combine this with new bedding, and you'll probably fall asleep in no time!

02 MUSIC
In this blog post I've shared some very good songs to fall asleep / relax to.

03 PUT YOUR PHONE AWAY
It's just another distraction. How do you expect to fall asleep if you reach over to check your facebook, blog, e-mail ++ every 3rd minute? Turn your wifi off, leave your phone on silent, and pretend it's not there.

04 DAYDREAM
Close your eyes and imagine something you really want to happen. The hot guy in your class asking you out, for example. Or you finally being able to buy your dream house. It doesn't even have to be realistic. Imagine you can fly. Or turn invisible.

05 OPEN YOUR WINDOW
Sometimes the reason you can't fall asleep is because it's too hot, or the air's too heavy. Let some fresh air in. Or get a fan.


2 comments



5 tips to become a morning person


Category: Verden, fra mitt perspektiv // 21.07.2017 at.13:40 o' clock // 2 comments


Do you feel like there's not enough hours in a day for all the things you have planned? Chances are you're just sleeping them away. So here's my 5 tips to get out of bed earlier.




01 NATURAL LIGHT
If your room is dark you'll convince yourself to continue sleeping. So throw those curtains away, keep your window open and let the sun in! 

02 MUSIC
Music makes you feel more energized. Create a spotify list, name it "Wake up bitch!" or whatever you like, and play it every morning. I suggest you include the following songs, even if these aren't the kind of songs you'd normally listen to:

Survivor - Eye of the tiger
Cyndi Lauper - Girls just wanna have fun
The pointer sisters - I'm so excited
Little Mix - Black magic
Manian - welcome to the club
Special D - Come with me
Special D - you
Smokie - living next door to Alice



03 DRINK SOMETHING
Some people drink coffee, some drink energy drinks, and some simply want a glass of cold water in the morning. Find something that works for you.

04 COLD SHOWERS
It's painful, but I promise it's worth it.

05 TAKE A WALK
Get some sun in your eyes and wind in your hair. Smell the morning dew and the fresh air.
 


2 comments



Let me be completely honest here..


Category: Verden, fra mitt perspektiv // 18.07.2017 at.22:42 o' clock // 2 comments


While browsing the internet today, I came across this picture.



My immediate response to this was, and will always be, to roll my eyes and shake my head. I'm gonna spare you the lies, and be completely honest: there's no way the little girl on the left could ever compare to the young woman on the right.

Before you attack me for being 'a cold hearted bitch', let me tell you a little bit about the little girl on the left. Her name is Adalia Rose. She suffers from something called progeria, which is a rare condition that makes her body age several times faster than the average human being. People with progeria typically live to be around 8 to 21 years old. Adalia's body, despite her young age, is like the body of an old lady. She will never have flawless skin, or long, thick, shiny hair. She will never have a pair of perfect double D's or a butt like the Kardashians. She will never be able to fit society's standard of what's considered beautiful.

So no. Comparing her looks to the woman on the right and telling her that they are just as visually attractive, is a big, fat, cruel lie. You know it. I know it. Adalia probably knows it. She's not blind. She has eyes. She can see. She has a brain. She can understand. She doesn't suffer from stupidity or denial, she suffers from progeria. Anyone who's seen her on TV or follow her on social media already knows that she's a very clever, young girl with a lot to teach us. She knows she's different. She knows she'll never be the next Miss Universe. So why bother lying? 

Because you want her to feel good about herself?

No. If you wanted her to feel good about herself, you'd tell her what a brave little girl she is. You'd tell her how talented she is. How funny she is. How clever she is. You'd tell her how strong she is. How she's such an inspiration. How she's so precious. You'd tell her that she's amazing. You'd tell her that you're there for her, if she ever wants a friend or just someone to talk to. You'd tell her that there are more important things in life than flawless skin and long hair. If you wanted her to feel good about herself, you wouldn't have to lie. There are a billion things you could tell her, a billion compliments you could give her, that has nothing to do with her looks.

But you don't care, do you? You don't care about her illness. You don't care if she believes you. You're just saying nice things so you can go to bed in the evening feeling like a good person. Like you did something good today. You're saying she's beautiful because deep down, you feel guilty for thinking the opposite, and you think that by "saving" her with lies about how beautiful she looks, you're a better person.

Adalia is beautiful. But it's not because of her looks. She will never look as good as the woman on the right. Adalia is beautiful because of her personality. How she makes people smile, even though she's the one fighting the hardest battle. She's beautiful for never giving up. She's beautiful for being different. But don't say she's just as good looking as a photoshopped model on a picture on the internet, because that's a lie, and we all know it.


2 comments



A world of clones


Category: Verden, fra mitt perspektiv // 13.07.2017 at.11:36 o' clock // 8 comments



THESE ARE NOT THE SAME PERSON.


NEITHER ARE THESE.

Fifteen pictures. Fifteen different people. Yet, they all kind of look exactly the same. Kylie Jenner's (picture number 7) copying Anastasia Petrova (picture number 6), and Isabel Raad's (picture number 8) copying Kylie Jenner. In a way they all look like Kim Kardashian, who's copying Megan Fox, who's copying  Angelina Jolie. Then you have Alena Shishkova, who looks like the blonde version of Megan Fox, and Sophie Elise (picture number 13) who's trying to look like Alena Shishkova. Round and round in an endless circle.

It's a world of clones.

Same hair, same lipstick, same highlighter.

Same poses, same smiles, same look in their eyes.

Same eyebrows, same lashes.

Same surgeries, same injections.

No originality.

Just real life copy- paste.

Surgeries becomes real life photoshop.

Makeup becomes real life lightening.

Makes me wonder who these people really are

when they're not trying to be someone else.


8 comments



Whenever you're feeling suicidal


Category: Verden, fra mitt perspektiv // 05.07.2017 at.14:32 o' clock // No comments


"If you believed someone was truly going to kill themselves, what would you do about it?", a girl named Jessica (nice name!) asked me yesterday on social media.



Assuming that I had a car and a drivers license, assuming I knew where they lived, I'd ring their doorbell. "Come with me", I'd say. We'd drive far away. I'd take them somewhere new. A new town and a new place. We'd walk around in the middle of the night, staring at the street light and the moon and the stars, and I'd remind them how peaceful the world can be at night.

We'd sit on a cliff and watch the sun rise over the ocean and I'd remind them that every morning when the sun rises, you are given a second chance at life. A new chance to start over, or make things right.

We'd go buy ice cream and they'd be reminded of how good it tastes.

I'd take them diving, and we'd explore a whole new world hidden under the surface. I'd take them to a pet store or a shelter to connect and play with animals, to remind them how wonderful these creatures are and that every life has value.

We'd walk around town and look at the people around us, and I'd remind them how every single one of these people have their own problems to deal with.

Assuming I could afford it, We'd get on a plane and I'd take them somewhere new. I'd show them a new culture and remind them that the world is full of possibilites. Full of new places to see, new smells to enjoy, new tastes to discover and new people to love.

And then, when the day came to an end and it was time for us to head home, I'd stop, and I'd say:

"You don't have to go back. You can stay right here, if that's what you want. You can leave your old life behind and start over. End your routine, not your life".

 


0 comments



To whoever's looking to get rid of their pet


Category: Verden, fra mitt perspektiv // 28.06.2017 at.22:25 o' clock // One comment


"We're moving and we can't take the cat with us". That's the most common excuse of them all. "Oh really?", I think to myself in a sarcastic, overly judgmental tone, "you're a cat owner and you're moving somewhere you can't take your cat with you?". Why is moving somewhere your cat isn't allowed even an option?



The second most common excuse? "We don't have time for him / her". Then I really hope that you, being the super busy person you are, never consider having a baby. I mean, if you ain't got time for a pet, how would you ever find time to care for a baby?

Then we have the "sudden allergy" excuses. Guess what? There are pills for that! Take them, and stop making up excuses to get rid of the pet you once pledged to love and care for until it dies.

Regardless of the excuses people around us may choose, one thing's for sure: there will be a lot of homeless cats this summer. Some will get murdered by their owners in the most brutal ways you can imagine. Drowned, choked or even crushed to death on purpose. Others will be abandoned and left to care for themselves. Thrown out of moving cars in the middle of the road, or left in a bag or a cage in the woods. Last but not least, let's not forget the cats who are taken to the vet just in time to get put down 'the humane way' before their owner goes on holiday with their wife / husband and kids.

Now, here's a little bit of information you probably didn't know about the so called 'humane' way. If you are going to force this upon a perfectly healthy, happy cat, you should at least know what your pet will be going through. I suggest you print this blog post so you can read it while working on your tan in Spain or wherever the f*ck you're spending your days this summer and just really think about what a shitty person you are. Personally I would hope that you get stung by poisionous jelly fish, get food allergies, sun burned and that your flight is canceled and you end up having the worst days of your life, but that's just me.

First your innocent, happily unaware, pet will see you leave. Then it will be taken to 'the room'. Every pet freaks out when getting anywhere near 'the room'. No one knows why. Maybe they smell death in the air, or they sense something that humans don't. It's strange and unexplainable, but it happens to all of them. Dogs, cats, rabbits... You name it. Once inside, your pet will be held down by one or two people, depending on the size of the pet and how freaked out it is. Then a vet will start the process. They will find a vein, typically in one of the front legs, and inject a lethal dose of some liquid. Hopefully your pet won't panic. They don't all just 'go to sleep' peacefully. Sometimes they die during a panic attack. Sometimes they will spasm for a while, gasp for air or defecate on themselves. 

When it's over, the corpse will be stacked like firewood with all the other corpses of unwanted or sick animals in a freezer. What will happen next? Will they be cremated? Taken to the dump? Rendered into pet food? You will never know and it probably won't even cross your mind.

I can only hope that there are at least some part of you feeling some sort of emotional pain from reading this.

But you don't care, do you? It was just an animal, wasn't it? And once the summer's over, you can go get a new one, right? A cute little kitten for your kid to play with. Then comes another summer, and you take it to the vet once again, to be put down, so you don't have to deal with it. You tell your kid it ran away, or that it was sick and died. Maybe you pretend to go look for it. Maybe you pretend there was nothing you could do. 

How do I know what happens behind closed doors? A vet once told me. And that should scare you. But it probably won't. And that scares me.
 


1 comment



Why you should spay your cat


Category: Verden, fra mitt perspektiv // 20.06.2017 at.18:30 o' clock // No comments


Thursday morning I'm taking my little princess, Argentina (2), to the vet to get her spayed. She's been an indoor cat all her life but now it's time to grant her some freedom, which means she will have to get spayed - or as I like to call it: "fixed" - before we let her walk out the door (or window) and explore the outside world.



According to some guy on facebook, spaying your cat is a bad idea. He wrote, and I quote:

"To all of you who think all cats in Norway should be spayed: we are eradicating the cats! (...) Don't tell me it's not about eradicating the cats! What do you think will happen when cats can't get pregnant anymore? Are the kittens just gonna appear out of thin air?"

The thing is: there are way too many cats in Norway already. I love animals and the idea of a world full of cats, but not like this. Right now there are more cats than there are people willing to welcome them into their homes, and as a result of that, many cats end up homeless. A homeless cat isn't a happy cat. A cat who's left to himself, with no one to care for him, is a cat that will die a slow, painful death. It's not about eradicating the cats, it's about population control. Only when every cat has a place to call home, we can slow down and relax about the spaying. Only when there are no cats dying on the streets we can let them get pregnant. Right now, when hundreds of cats are left to die alone, some because they've never had a home, and others because their family kicked them out before going on a holiday, the humane thing to do is to spay your cat.

 

DO YOU GUYS AGREE?
WHY OR WHY NOT?


0 comments


WHY ENGLISH?


Through social media I've come to know a lot of people from all over the world. Most of them don't speak Norwegian. Some of them read my blog regardless. So I wanted to make a blog in a language they could actually understand.

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